Frank Andrew Gonda

Frank Andrew Gonda, Jr., 93, d. Dec 25. Son of Frank and Jessie, brother of Pat Gorski. Devoted husband to Eleanor (d. 1998) and Elizabeth (d. 2024). Proud father to Sue (Cay), Frank, & Terry (Kirsti); grandfather to Spencer, Kellen, & Tess; step dad to Randy (Tami),Toni (Bob), Terese (Dean), Jerry (Janice), Jeff (Lisa), and grandpa & great grandpa to many. Uncle to Gail, Gary, Mike and Jim. Veteran, musician, design engineer AMC/Chrysler, athlete, coach, teacher, volunteer, storyteller, pilot. With a stunning memory, sense of humor, and creative mind, Frank relished telling detailed stories of his Polish Detroit childhood, usually involving hijinks--starting with his first date at age five taking the streetcar in Detroit, learning clarinet and saxophone from his dad, boxing at the local boys club from ages 7-9 (also taught by his dad), and “borrowing” his dad’s car at age 12 (strapping on boxes to reach the pedals). At age 12 he learned the power of music when in the same night, he had both his first paid gig as a saxophone player in a wedding band at a bar and his first kiss during a break when he snuck out to the alley with an admiring girl. A passionate and intelligent athlete, he recounted many stories of his baseball and football feats, many of which made the local paper. He and friends formed their own football and baseball teams at St. Stephen’s middle school because the school didn’t have them. He spent a year and a half in junior seminary at Sacred Heart; they kicked him out after he snuck out to join a baseball league under an assumed name. He also decided he liked girls too much. He was proud of his Korean War army service as a Sergeant crypto expert. He told chilling adventure stories: pitching to legendary slugger Ted Williams; his unit acquiring a truck full of booze and setting up a homemade bar; and a secret mission behind enemy lines leading to a helicopter ladder escape off a cliff while being shot at. A year after returning home he married Eleanor (a family friend since birth) and began a long career in automotive body engineering at Ford and GM, finally landing at AMC/Jeep (later Chrysler). He began as a draftsman and became a successful manager. Frank and Eleanor had three kids and were active members at Redford’s St Valentine’s Parish. He liked to sing songs with the kids (Waltzing Matilda, My Darlin’ Clementine), and passed on his passion for music and storytelling to them. He passed his love of sports to Terry and Frank, even coaching some of their teams. He was a walking encyclopedia (and most of the time he was right!), always teaching (his kids all knew how to change their own oil!). He was a skilled craftsman, building a bar, a built-in desk, basement family room, pool deck and custom bunk bed for the girls. (Thank you Sam for working along side!) Music and history: As a storyteller, he engrossed his listener (sometimes with TMI minute detail), always animated, with tales from Army, automotive, childhood, and flying adventures. He had a love of history, which he passed to daughter Sue who became a history professor, and he especially loved histories of Poland and World War II. He agreed to sing and play saxaphone on Terry’s commercial release CD (2004) and proudly spoke about “his CD”. His voice on “If I needed You” (a song he had suggested) has an essence of Johnny Cash vulnerability to it and his performance is truly moving. Frank and Eleanor formed deep life-long friendships at church, helping to establish the monthly “gourmet group” (the men took turns cooking). After moving to Northville and helping found St. James Parish, Frank was proud that Eleanor was the first female usher. They volunteered at a nearby doctors’ office, enjoyed traveling (annually to Florida). After Eleanor died in 1998 from cancer, Frank coped with his grief by enrolling in Skip Barber’s one-week racing school, and a few months later at the age of 68, started flight school. Flying was a deep love for him, completing his exams at age 70, and taking anyone who would go up with him. Once he spotted a fire from the air and notified authorities. When his teacher showed him aerobatics, expecting Frank to turn green, Frank asked to do it again and teach him how. In 1998, he started dating Betty Verkerke, a dear friend from the widower’s spinoff from the Gourmet Group. They quickly fell in love and by March 1999, the two families who had known each other for decades became one blended tribe. The Verkerkes welcomed Frank with open hearts, and he brought his humor and love to an ever-expanding joint family. He relished his role as a grandpa to Frank and Karen’s three children as well as to the 16 children of Betty’s five kids, as great-uncle to nephew Jim’s kids and eventually as a great grandpa. He was proud of his grand, blended family. Frank and Betty had so much fun in their 24 years together, embracing both their spiritual and silly sides and being supportive parents and grandparents. Frank always always spoke of how he loved laughing with Betty every day and sitting with his arm around her. The two of them helped start the Primetimer’s group at St. James. They took several trips to Florida, to the beloved Verkerke cottage up north, and one to Poland. When Betty developed dementia, Dad moved in with son Frank in Northville at the end of 2019, just after Betty moved into memory care. The Franks weathered COVID together, miraculously staying COVID-free and supporting each other. With only rare exceptions, Frank visited his beloved Betty every day, always with a small Häagen-Dazs chocolate ice cream and two dark chocolates. Like a Hollywood storybook ending, Frank sang the old songs with Betty: Waltzing Matilda, Clementine, Down in the Valley, and You Are My Sunshine. With his arm around her for a few hours, he said it felt like heaven. He and Betty’s daughter Toni bonded on daily visits. Frank had his first heart bypass at 49 and began a lifetime practice of meditating for health and peace. He had his second bypass after the FAA red flagged him while applying for his pilot license--his love for flying saved his life. His meditation had many benefits, but most notably, he envisioned building a network of capillaries around his major arteries. He was left with just one working that had its own capillary blood supply. To his cardiologist’s amazement, this kept him alive for well over a decade. After Betty passed in February of 2024, Frank’s big heart was truly broken. As his health declined and heart failure began, he continued to be an inspiration to his family as he modeled how to live and how to die with character and dignity. Son Frank was his staunch advocate and caretaker, having his kids over once a week to have “sliders with grandpa” so they could learn from him. Sue flew in a week at a time from Massachusetts every month or so and Terry and Kirsti stopped by regularly, often bringing dinner. Toni called Frank daily and periodically visited with daughter Michelle. Betty’s family continued to share news and pictures with grandpa. No one was surrounded with more care and love in old age. His famous sense of humor endured to the end, telling hospital workers over Halloween that his costume was a 93-year-old man (and the next day: “How do I get this 93-year-old costume off?). Poetically, Frank went back home to God to celebrate Christmas with all those loved ones he missed so terribly…parents, sister, friends, family and two wonderful wives. Visitation Jan 3 at the O’Brien-Sullivan Funeral Home 41555 Grand River Novi 3-8pm with a Scripture service 7pm. Instate Jan 4 at St James Church 46325 W 10 Mile Novi 9:30am until the funeral Mass at 10:00am. In lieu of flowers donations to Angela Hospice www.angelahospice.org or Alzheimer’s Assn. www.alz.org

Frank Andrew Gonda

November 9, 1931 - December 25, 2024